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Here is my list for great parenting advice and resources from educational websites, schools, and professionals.
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Number 1 Teacher Earrings
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Social and Emotional Help
Parents! There is something teachers are dying to tell you but are too nervous to bring up. That would be your child's social skills and emotional regulation are severely lacking! Here is the deal, when your child can handle issues out at recess and can keep themselves regulated, all of us benefit! Parents, teacher, friends, and future bosses. I am only a teacher . If your family needs specific help on healing and strategies please contact a licensed therapist. A good resource my family uses is Dr. Becky. She has podcasts, videos, and a book. Check her out.
Social Problem Solving
When you raise a problem solver, not only is your life easier, so is everyone they encounter! My husband and I are jumping on this band wagon right now and we have three middle schoolers. It's never too late to start! I'm not saying it is easy to teach social problem solving but I have a few strategies I've tested out this year that can help.
First, start with a conversation. Are in the car driving all over town to get your kids to their next extracurricular event? This is the perfect time to have a chat about their day. Don't force a conversation but get them used to you asking and caring. Believe me they will eventually take the bait and start talking. When they talk about issues at school or with friends, and they will, be ready to just listen. Here is where I get tripped up every time my kids open up, I start problem solving for them. They are not learning at this point and zero thinking is occurring. Say, "that sounds tough!" or something along those lines so your child feels heard and their emotions are validated! Once they have gotten it all off their chest, start asking questions like, "what do you think you are going to do?", "what options do you have to solve this?" Is their solution off the wall? Then ask guiding questions like, "how do you think they are going to feel if you say that?"
Have them think. We don't let our kids "think" enough. Let them be little scientists who take a problem, come up with a solution, and test it out the next day at recess. This is only for the little stuff. Kids can handle kid situations. Do not make them deal with big issue stuff that can and should be handled by an adult!
Emotional Regulation
This is a big one and one that needs to be addressed right away. Most problematic behavior comes from not knowing how to handle big emotions. We all feel big emotions, so teach your child strategies on how to work through them, not suppress them.
I start with honesty! I tell my kids exactly what I do when I have big emotions and sometimes I tell them situations that trigger those big emotions. This is a great way to provide the opportunity for buy in. If their parents open up to big emotions, they will be more likely to identify their emotions as well. Share your strategies. If you don't have any then research together ways to calm big feels. Most importantly, practice these strategies together. Take a couple minutes and have the entire family work through a strategy. When we all do something, we normalize it in our house. It makes taking care of yourself okay. I love this bit of advice, if you mess up and miss an opportunity to use a strategy, tell your kids! They want to know that we all make mistakes and when you point out a time that you yourself should have made a better/different choice, if frees your children to do the same.
Strategies
Deep Breathing - long and slow in through the nose, then long and slow out through the mouth.
Room Break - Sometimes we get so frustrated that the best choice of action is to take a break in a safe place. In a lot of cases that area is a bedroom. When I was kid, I would go lie in my bathtub. It was solid and safe.
Pillow Screams - This is a fun one! You take a pillow, fill your lungs, and scream as loud as possible into it. After two or three of these, the tension leaks out of my muscles.
Pillow Punches - This can be for anyone, do not make this a male strategy. place a pillow on the side of your bed, wind up, and punch the stuffing out of it. It feels wonderful to really pound something sometime.
Self Hugs - This a is regulation strategy anyone can use when they don't feel safe in a situation or with scary emotions. Wrap both arms around your front and give yourself a gentle squeeze. It is very comforting to people who crave physical touch.
Meditation - When everyone is stressed out, sometime you need to pull out a Youtube meditation video or podcast. Someone else's voice and calming music can be very therapeutic.
Social Problem Solving
When you raise a problem solver, not only is your life easier, so is everyone they encounter! My husband and I are jumping on this band wagon right now and we have three middle schoolers. It's never too late to start! I'm not saying it is easy to teach social problem solving but I have a few strategies I've tested out this year that can help.
First, start with a conversation. Are in the car driving all over town to get your kids to their next extracurricular event? This is the perfect time to have a chat about their day. Don't force a conversation but get them used to you asking and caring. Believe me they will eventually take the bait and start talking. When they talk about issues at school or with friends, and they will, be ready to just listen. Here is where I get tripped up every time my kids open up, I start problem solving for them. They are not learning at this point and zero thinking is occurring. Say, "that sounds tough!" or something along those lines so your child feels heard and their emotions are validated! Once they have gotten it all off their chest, start asking questions like, "what do you think you are going to do?", "what options do you have to solve this?" Is their solution off the wall? Then ask guiding questions like, "how do you think they are going to feel if you say that?"
Have them think. We don't let our kids "think" enough. Let them be little scientists who take a problem, come up with a solution, and test it out the next day at recess. This is only for the little stuff. Kids can handle kid situations. Do not make them deal with big issue stuff that can and should be handled by an adult!
Emotional Regulation
This is a big one and one that needs to be addressed right away. Most problematic behavior comes from not knowing how to handle big emotions. We all feel big emotions, so teach your child strategies on how to work through them, not suppress them.
I start with honesty! I tell my kids exactly what I do when I have big emotions and sometimes I tell them situations that trigger those big emotions. This is a great way to provide the opportunity for buy in. If their parents open up to big emotions, they will be more likely to identify their emotions as well. Share your strategies. If you don't have any then research together ways to calm big feels. Most importantly, practice these strategies together. Take a couple minutes and have the entire family work through a strategy. When we all do something, we normalize it in our house. It makes taking care of yourself okay. I love this bit of advice, if you mess up and miss an opportunity to use a strategy, tell your kids! They want to know that we all make mistakes and when you point out a time that you yourself should have made a better/different choice, if frees your children to do the same.
Strategies
Deep Breathing - long and slow in through the nose, then long and slow out through the mouth.
Room Break - Sometimes we get so frustrated that the best choice of action is to take a break in a safe place. In a lot of cases that area is a bedroom. When I was kid, I would go lie in my bathtub. It was solid and safe.
Pillow Screams - This is a fun one! You take a pillow, fill your lungs, and scream as loud as possible into it. After two or three of these, the tension leaks out of my muscles.
Pillow Punches - This can be for anyone, do not make this a male strategy. place a pillow on the side of your bed, wind up, and punch the stuffing out of it. It feels wonderful to really pound something sometime.
Self Hugs - This a is regulation strategy anyone can use when they don't feel safe in a situation or with scary emotions. Wrap both arms around your front and give yourself a gentle squeeze. It is very comforting to people who crave physical touch.
Meditation - When everyone is stressed out, sometime you need to pull out a Youtube meditation video or podcast. Someone else's voice and calming music can be very therapeutic.
Custom Soccer
Reading
Reading Tips for Parents. Reading Rockets is a great literacy resource. The link below will take you to a printable guide organized by grade level.
Reading Strategies and Study Skills Support. Pleasant Valley Community School District came up with a study skills guide for parents to make the most of their child's reading at home.
Building Better Readers Guide. Florida Department of Education posted a list of suggestions for parents to help build their child's reading skills.
Decoding Strategies. Finally In First provides a great poster for parents to use as an aid in helping their child read.
Reading Tips. Colorado Department of Education created this easy to read brochure for parents.
Reading Strategies. Island Trees Elementary Reading Program has strategies for parents to help your children improve their reading skills.
Writing
Writing Tips. U.S. Department of Education created a list of pointers to think about when readying your child for school.
Writing Resources. Read Write Think is great for all your literacy needs. They provide advice as well as games and printables.
Tool Kit. LD Online is a sight dedicated as a learning guide for children with special needs and ADHD. But don't let that scare you because the tools are very informative POWERful!
Beginning Writing Skills. Get Ready To Read is a great article about what early write looks like and how you can help.
Writing Activities. This pdf provides parents with ideas and tools to help get your child ready for writing.
Word Study
Word Study Guide. Carroll County created this awesome newsletter for parents and teachers. This guide is a great insight as to what your child is or should be learning when working with words.
Spelling. Child Development Institute has some great pointers on how to get started, why to get started, and ways to help your child with spelling.
Preschool
Word Wall Templates. DLTK's are a great way to get started exploring words. These words can be found around the house or within a favorite book.
Math
Parent Roadmaps to Common Core Standards - Mathematics. This site links what children are learning in mathematics for each grade level.
Preparing for Math. Scholastic gives a basic outline of concepts to be learned at this age and it's importance.
Preschool
Early Math. Get Ready To Read offers advice and great activities for parents to test out at home.
Science
Science Matters. National Science Teacher Association shows busy parents easy ways to bring science into your child's daily life.
Exploring Science. PBS Parents gives you a few pointers for helping your child become aware of science around them.
Social Studies
Parents Helping Students. Michigan.gov offers tips on awareness and relevance in different areas of social studies.
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